“Black men must’ve left a bad taste in your mouth”

A girl at work noticed me looking at this guy and said,
 “Why do you like Asian men? Black men must’ve left a bad taste in your mouth”

Me. What do you mean?

Her: I mean you must of had a bad experience with a black guy to only date Asian men.


I am going to get through this with as few cuss words as possible but I do get really frustrated and angry when people take one word and turn it into a fucked up novel filled with bullshit and assumptions. OK deep breath!!!!!!

Where does one begin? ok how about here:

“Why do you like Asian men? Black men must’ve left a bad taste in your mouth”

Yooooooo wtf times 300. Why NOT like Asian men? AND why does Black men have to leave a bad taste in my mouth in order for me to like them? How come I cant like Asian AND Black men? How can a no name ass coworker that I never had a conversation with open up her mouth and dare ask a question as such?! Maybe I’ve never dated Black men and only dated White men prior to Asian? The gall of some people, to limit African American women to African American males as if they’re the only option to date  but yea if you want the truth, let’s get to it.

“I mean you must of had A bad experience with a black guy to only date Asian men.”

You damn right I had a bad experience!  A bad experience though?  A?  Just 1?  NOPE! I had 2, 3 – multiple bad experiences.  I’ve had a gun in my face, been thrown on a bed and had my vagina tortured because I refused to give oral sex.  I’ve had pre cancerous cells scraped from my cervix because a guy that proposed to me gave me HPV and now I cant have kids. The man I loved for over 4 years had me believing I was the ONE but not only did he have a girlfriend but he had a baby by another woman and to make matters worse, after we “talked” things out and I took him back I realized he only fucked with me because I couldn’t have kids and he didn’t want another “slip up”. For a woman that has always wanted 5 kids how the hell do you think that made me feel? To know the man I loved only wanted me for sex because I can’t reproduce and while you’re in his bed on his birthday you see the text  from another woman that lets you know you’re still the sixth man. So hell yea I had bad experience and they just so happened to be with black men. So how many times am I suppose to keep letting these types of things happen to me why not try something different for a change? I’m not blaming black men for what a few guys because hell these guys could’ve be any race. MEN are MEN regardless of color!

Instead of assuming Black men left a bad taste in my mouth why not thank the Asian man that gave me hope in finding love again. Thank him for not allowing hurt, hate and past experiences to control me and for preventing me from blaming black men for everything. Thank him for helping to believe all men are not the same and not to put what one or two or three guys did to me on every man that I meet. Thank the Asian man for helping me to lower my guard, break down my defenses and stop personally attacking  men. Thank him because if it wasn’t for that Asian guy that just wanted conversation that just so happened to turn into more I would be one evil woman. And who knows maybe one day there will be a white guy that would spark an innocent conversation with me and it’ll lead to something more. So  yes right now my preference is for Asian males but while so many heart broken women are becoming lesbian  and completely put off from men, thank that Asian man for restoring my faith in the males species and not to treat men the same way they’ve treated me. Thank him because he actually taught me to open my mind AND my heart. Taught me to actually love more and more passionately.  To forgive. Words can’t express what he did for me and how much hate he save me from having and how much pain he prevented me from spreading. When I think about all the things that has happened to me at the hands of black men I have every right to get mad, to cry , to scream, to reject them. It is clear to see why my experiences can leave ill feelings but…..

Do Black men leave bad taste in MY mouth?

bad taste in my mouth

Naw. I don’t think so, infact I have a date with one coming up! and you have an Asian man to thank for that.


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